All This Time
by KayChan4U
Summary: Suzaku has been Zero for quite some time, and has still managed to keep together the Black Knights. Though along the way he finds out that someone close to him has been alive all this time without him knowing. What will happen between the two now?


**Okay...so I was reluctant about posting this so soon. I only wrote this up last night, yet the idea has been in my head for a very long time. It didn't all come out like I remember it, but it's still close enough, and not everything I had in my head is in this particular chapter. This is just the beginning after all. **

**Now then..I don't want any bashing :/ And I certainly don't want people commenting saying "BUT LELOUCH IS D**D (I don't wish to see Lelouch's name and that word in the same sentence. It's blasphemy X( ) BLAH BLAH BLAH SUNRISE THIS, TANIGUCHI THAT." NO. There will be none of that ._. I'm writing this because it's my own idea, and I want lots of people to enjoy it as well.**

**That being said, enjoy :3~ Oh, and I don't own Code Geass or any of the characters, sadly. How I wish they were mine T^T Lelouch anyway...**

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_This is also punishment for you..._

_You will be the defender of justice and wear a mask forever..._

_You will no longer be able to live as Kururugi Suzaku..._

_You will sacrifice all of your own happiness for the world...eternally..._

_**I accept...that Geass...**_

Setting the undamaged mask down on the desk, Suzaku walked over and flopped down on his large bed, silk sheets shifting underneath him. Staring up at the ceiling before him, he sighed and closed his eyes. Today...was just another day. The same routine: running about and keeping control of Britannia, making sure no evil befell it and its citizens. Though today _would _have been normal as always. **She **was coming. Coming to take part in the negotiations that were about to commence in the Britannian Empire.

That woman was none other than C.C. Over time, she had managed to start anew and become the Empress of a land much further away from them. They had hardly kept in touch, but on important occasions they would see each other to discuss politics and such matters.

She was still the same. Golden eyes, long green hair. The only difference now was that she was no longer seen as a witch, but an important figure head. Her clothing had changed drastically as well. Only clothing that fit her status.

As for Suzaku himself, he hadn't changed either. He hadn't aged. He was still living as Zero, managing the Black Knights to the fullest and sacrificing himself to help society.

Just when he thought he was going to get a much longer break, a knock alerted him at his door.

"Lord Zero. It appears our very important guest is here."

'_Great...I didn't think she'd make it here so quickly.' _"Ah, of course. Give me a few moments of preparation. I shall meet her in the audience hall shortly."

The guard, not viewable by his eyes, bowed and was off in an instant.

Sitting up against the sheets, Suzaku stared down at them and ran his hand against them, before gripping them slightly. He narrowed his eyes, a frown appearing on his face. He always had this feeling whenever he met with her in person. It was never pleasant. It was as if he was nervous about something. No, that wasn't it. It was something else. His chest tightened at just seeing her face. He hated it. Every time they met, he was reminded of _him._ Every damn time it caused a heavy weight on Suzaku's heart, and he couldn't bear looking her in the face. Thank the gods he always had his mask on. She wouldn't be able to tell where his eyes were drifting to each time.

"I...might as well get it over with. No point in dragging this out anymore than I want to. I'm Zero after all..I...don't hesitate for anything." Getting up after mentally preparing himself (once again), he reached for the Zero mask and stared at it intently, brushing his fingers against the left side, wincing internally. Had it been that long? Though the mask appeared clean to everyone around him, Suzaku could clearly see the blood stain still in its place. Those devilish streaks that threatened him day after day of his miserable life, taunting him as if to remind him of what he had done. He'd never forget it. It was a scar that had been embedded into his heart from the day it had happened.

Closing his eyes and shaking his head, he brought himself back to reality, trying to forget the moment and quickly placed the mask over his face, straightening it out.

'_Hopefully this won't take long.' _Suzaku managed to lift his feet and drag himself over to the door of his large room, opening it and walking through the halls of the much new, yet old to him, Britannian Empire.

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The large doors to the audience hall opened with a large creaking sound, echoing throughout the room. Standing there in the middle of the room was C.C., a transparent veil resting atop her head, long, white silk robes clinging to her waist and splashing out against the floor. The ends of the sleeves being much longer and hitting almost to her knees. She turned upon hearing the door, a small smile forming on her lips as she watched Zero stroll closer to her figure.

Suzaku had two Black Knights accompany him every time they met. It wasn't as if he didn't trust C.C. It was more of something that was required. Though he was puzzled as to why C.C. had someone with her today. Normally she came by herself or had a few guards with her that waited outside. This time there was a male, just slightly taller than her (more along his own height, if not a little shorter) standing beside her. His face was hidden with a beige veil which wasn't transparent like her own. His clothing also seemed different. He certainly wasn't of royal decent by the look of it. He must have been a servant from her castle that she decided to bring along this time.

Not wasting anytime, C.C. spoke up. "Lord Zero. If I may ask, could we have this discussion in private?"

That was strange. It never usually mattered if they had people with them or not. Just what exactly was it she wanted to talk about other than the usual? Something was up.

"I...of course. If that would please you, your highness." Turning his head, he glanced back at his two guards and pulled his hand up, giving them the signal to dispatch themselves from the room.

They seemed hesitant at first, looking at each other before turning back to their Lord and finally bowing.

"We'll be outside if you need anything, my lord." The two turned and headed out through the big doors, the sound of them opening once more letting out an audible creak.

Once out of sight, Suzaku turned back to C.C., confused as to why her servant hadn't left as well.

"Is there any particular reason why your guard isn't gone as well?"

C.C. could only smile, tilting her head to the side and looking at the man beside her before turning back to Suzaku.

"Oh I assure you. He is much needed today. That is why I had your men leave. What we're going to discuss must be between us three and us alone. Neh, isn't that right?"

The servant had let out a low chuckle, one loud enough though to catch Suzaku's ears. Now he was curious. What did they need to talk about that this man must be present for as well?

"Very well. I won't question your motives. Although I would like to first get to the matter at hand as soon as possible, if you wouldn't mind."

Taking a few steps away from her, he glanced towards the paintings behind the current thrones. Each painting had been of each new emperor or empress after the very late Charles zi Britannia. Other portraits of princes and princesses had been strung across the hallways outside of the room.

"I take it you would like to know the current situation. As of now, there's nothing much to worry about. Adalberto zu Britannia has been keeping a good eye around New Area 11—"

"I thought you got rid of it."

"......." Suzaku stood in silence after C.C.'s words. Turning slowly towards her, he spoke once again.

"Ah...we were planning on it as we discussed a couple months ago, but it seems a lot of the Japanese wanted to keep it as they felt it would sully their ancestors if they had their original homes removed. That place has been there for quite some time, and only years ago had we changed the name to New Area 11. As Zero, I had a part in whether or not we should tear the place down. Adalberto himself, being the Governor, suggested that the word of the people made a great impact on our decision, so we chose to keep it there. I hope it doesn't disappoint you. Not to show any disrespect, but this is our society. You have your own place to worry about, do you not?"

C.C. could only cross her arms and sigh in defeat. She supposed there was no use tampering in it any longer.

"I suppose you're right. I just figured it would do you some good to finally tear that place down. Though as long as Britannia is a place where the Japanese and Britannian's can live amongst each other, I shouldn't complain. You know why we're doing this, after all."

Of course he knew. He knew why he had been doing everything up until this point. It was _his _request. His ideal world, and Suzaku, with the help of others, had made it happen. There hadn't been much of a war in the longest time. Maybe petty thieves from time to time, but nothing as to harm the place they called home.

"So, what of Princess Adalia ru Britannia? I've been hearing that her and Prince Berchtwaldra Britannia are still at quarrels with each other. Are they ever going to forget what happened and simply make peace with each other?"

Suzaku brought a hand to his chin, thinking that scenario out in his head a few times. He had tried confronting them both, but it seemed that they were never going to get over it. It was a silly simple matter really. Adalia wanted the same authority that Berchtwald had. Though each person was assigned to their own respective places in Britannia, Adalia seemed to think that hers just wasn't enough. To say the least, Adalia was a selfish brat.

"I'm afraid not. Princess Adalia is quite stubborn, as you know. I really wish you could convince her to drop this whole thing. She's quite fond of you, your highness."

C.C. strolled around the room, glancing at the images around her as she spoke. "I can influence her, but even my words cannot control her actions. This is something she must get over by herself. If you are to have this kingdom living in peace, it must be done by the people themselves who can tell right from wrong. I don't just mean Adalia, I mean the whole palace. Though Adalia is just stubborn and hasn't grown up yet it seems." Turning to the masked defender of justice, she smiled warmly and rested a hand upon her hip.

"Now then. I'd like to discuss what I truly came here for. It's been quite a long time. Too long if you ask me. I honestly think it's time you learned the truth, Kururugi Suzaku."

Suzaku stood stunned, watching as C.C. made her way over to her servant, standing beside him as if something drastic were to happen.

He couldn't help but chuckle. How ironic she would call him that after all this time.

"That name...no one's called me that for years, and you just bring it up so suddenly. It makes me nervous. Are you telling me there's something you've been keeping from me all this time?"

"That is what you're about to find out. I will warn you, however, that I cannot promise you won't act drastically about this. It's going to come as a shock to you, so I want you to prepare yourself for it."

Now this had him really curious. For once in the longest time, he looked up and stared her right in the face, although his own was still hidden. His eyes narrowed as his chest tightened more, fists clenched at his sides.

"Prepare myself? This sounds serious, _C.C._" He finished off saying her name in a more vile way. He had only been told that he would discover something she had been keeping from him, and yet it angered him. Why? What was he getting so worked up about? He hadn't even heard what it was yet.

"Suzaku," C.C. began. "I assume you remember what happened that day three hundred years ago, correct? In 2018—"

"I remember what happened! Shut up!" Closing his eyes, his fists clenched harder until he felt his nails digging into his palms even through the gloves. He was reminded every god forsaken day. Why did _she _have to bring it up? It only made things worse for him. Not once had she mentioned it since then. Three hundred years had passed them, and it was something he was taking with him for eternity.

"Wait, Suzaku. Let me finish. I'm trying to tell you—"

"I don't want to hear it! Stop calling me Suzaku! I'm Zero! I don't need you of all people reminding me of—"

"**Suzaku**!"

Though this time it wasn't C.C.'s voice that had said his name. Eyes widening in horror, Suzaku looked up, staring not at C.C., but the servant she had brought with her. That voice..that low, commanding voice. Was it his imagination? It had to have been. The memories C.C. had been bringing up was getting to him was all.

Or so he thought.

The servant figure started towards him, his face still completely hidden from view. Once he was only a few inches from Suzaku's face, he lifted his hand and pressed it against the left side of the mask, running his fingers down it. Smiling, though it wasn't seen, he let out a sigh and began lifting the mask from the brunette's face.

"Three Hundred years and I can still see the mess I made on this mask.."

_No..._

Suzaku couldn't move. Couldn't breathe. Couldn't do anything. His feet were glued to the floor and everything for him just stopped.

_Stop it..._

The mask had finally been lifted from him, and now C.C. and the servant could clearly see his face. They could see his wide eyes, shock written all over them.

"I suppose I've been crueller than I had intended to be. You've been carrying this burden for quite some time, neh, Suzaku?" Finally handing the Zero mask to C.C., the figure brought his hands to his own face, lifting the cream colored cloth from over it and brought it over his head. Since his eyes had been closed before hand, he opened them, staring straight up at Suzaku. Not a single emotion played on his face.

Suzaku however, looked as though he had seen a ghost.

His hands began to tremble, emerald eyes filling up with unshed tears, mouth half open, though no real words came out. Only half choked sounds that were broken up.

"L...L....Le...lou...ch..."

Blinking suddenly in surprise Lelouch, reached a hand outward. "Oi..Suzaku, it's alright.."

Slapping the hand away on instinct, Suzaku took a few steps back, voice shaking as he spoke.

"I..I killed you! I **killed** you Lelouch! I murdered you three hundred years ago in front of everyone! You're not real...you're not.." He brought his hands up to his face, covering it and peering through his fingers towards the floor.

"Suza—" C.C. began, but Lelouch brought a hand up, stopping her. He knew Suzaku wouldn't be able to take the initial shock of it all. He was dead, after all. Lelouch vi Britannia had died at that very moment all those years ago. He had lived as R.R. from then on.

Taking another step forward, Lelouch tried to approach him again. "Suzaku, calm down. Just listen. Please, I—"

"Don't come near me!" Suzaku fought with his shaky hands to find the sword that rest at his side. The very sword he had used to finish their plan ages ago. Pulling it from the sheath, he pointed it towards the other, trying to keep a balanced grip upon it.

Lelouch stopped once again, smiling softly. He still kept that thing around? He really was torturing himself it seemed.

"You still have Damocles I see. I'm not surprised. You know, if it makes you feel any better, you can kill me again and again until you're satisfied. I won't die."

Eyes widening more, Suzaku's grip on the sword began to loosen. What did he just say? Was this really Lelouch? Staring down at the weapon, he cringed as he remembered just what he had done with this before. Images flashed through his head, causing his fingers to fumble. No, there was no way he could do that again. He had locked himself away in his room after that for the entire day. He didn't know what he would do with himself if he had done it again. Finally, his grip on the sword had ceased, and he let go, listening to the sound of it hitting the floor.

Looking back up, the unstable brunette stared at the violet eyed boy, his voice cracking as he spoke.

"Le-...Lelouch?"

Lelouch nodded, and tried once again, but very slowly this time, to approach Suzaku. When he was just in front of him, he brought a hand up and placed it against the other boy's cheek.

"See? I'm very real, Suzaku. It's true I had died at that time, but it was necessary. Simply dying to atone for my sins would have been the easy way out. Just as I made you live forever as punishment, I too have to live with everything I've done. Living away from my friends, my followers, Nunnally, and you..."

Suzaku slowly brought a hand up, pressing it against Lelouch's own. It was true. His hand was very much warm. Not cold like he had imagined. This time, there was no way for him to stop the tears from flowing down his cheeks. He had been living, no, _surviving_ this whole time with a hole in his chest, regretting what he had done. Even if Lelouch had told him to do it, he still felt the pain of taking the life of the closest person to him.

"You...you left me..."

"I did. And it was punishment for the both of us. I've been waiting a long time. I had to make you believe I was dead. It was the only way. I suppose I waited a little longer than necessary but—"

But Lelouch stopped his sentence as he felt Suzaku falling. The former knight fell to his knees and swiftly brought his arms around Lelouch's waist, burying his face against his stomach, the very place he had stabbed him in. He wondered if there was a scar. He'd worry about it later. For now, he sobbed. His cries were heard through the whole room, even muffled by Lelouch's shirt.

The former prince stood in shock for a moment, but soon became sympathetic towards the other and rested a hand atop his head, running his fingers through the brown curls he remembered. This only made Suzaku's grip tighten, and Lelouch had to step back for a moment.

"A-alright Suzaku. I can't die, but I still need to breathe.." Though Suzaku didn't stop crying, he managed to loosen his grip just a bit.

C.C. stood with a smile on her face, bringing a hand up to twirl a finger around her hair. "I feel as though I should leave you two be. After all, you've been with me all this time."

Lelouch continued to run his fingers through Suzaku's hair, trying to calm him even a bit. "It's fine. I don't think he cares right now as long as no one else comes in. Just wait a bit longer, C.C."

It had been forever, but Lelouch had come back to him. He never thought he'd ever see him again. He was sure of himself that he had killed him. But he was back now, and Suzaku was for certain that he wasn't letting him go ever again. Though it dawned on him. Lelouch couldn't die? How was that possible? Finally able to somewhat subside his cries, he looked up at Lelouch's face, eyes rimmed red with tears.

"How..?"

"Code." Was how Lelouch started it, looking down at his friend. "Remember that time, a very long time ago, before I killed my father? You saw him grab me. As I yelled at him to die, his Code transferred to me. Do you want to know where it went, Suzaku? I can show you."

Well, Suzaku was curious if anything. Lelouch attempted to pull away, and Suzaku tilted his head.

"I need to turn around, if that's alright with you."

"A-ah..I'm sorry." Suzaku released his hold and stood up so Lelouch could have room to show him.

The former Britannian turned himself around and lifted his hair showing Suzaku the back of his neck. There lied the Code mark. Completely hidden from Lelouch himself.

"It only makes sense, doesn't it? I suppose you'd like to know where I've been all this time as well. Actually, I'm sure you know all this already, coming here with C.C. and all. Although I must say...the country's a lot nicer than what I took it to be. I haven't been there in a couple hundred years though....Suzaku?"

Suzaku had been listening, that was true. But he was looking at Lelouch's face the whole time. It was still so unreal to him. Turning him the rest of the way so Lelouch was facing him, Suzaku brought him into an embrace, resting his head against his shoulder. It was still the same as it was back then. There wasn't much about him that was different. This _was _Lelouch. The same Lelouch he had always known.

"Wha—Suzaku.."

"Just a bit longer. Let's stay like this. I'm still in shock after all. Give me some time to...to.."

Lelouch paused for a moment and closed his eyes, sighing and brought a hand up against Suzaku's back, patting him softly. "Alright. Take as long as you need. You deserve that much after all the grief I've caused you to endure. When you're ready however, we can talk about everything. I promise."

And they had a _lot _to talk about. Everything that had been going on since after that time. Everything Lelouch had missed, and everything Suzaku had to know.

Everything.

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**Well, there you have it. First chapter is out. I'm not exactly sure when the second chapter will be here. College has been slave driving my ass lately x_x Just drop a review and tell me what you think.**


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